Allow me to introduce Maeve Brooklyn Ontiveros, my new lovely rent-a-niece. Born on December 20th, 2007, one era prior to the "The Ribeye", she is the foretold "BFF" or "girlfriend" of the Ribeye (while sex of Ribeye not known yet, you can clearly see we're all betting its a boy).
Born to some of the wonkiest parents around, she demonstrates only the strongest features of both parents; Daddy's chubby cheeks and irritable personality when hungry, while representin' Mommy by a somewhat ritualistic regurgitation. It's not a 10pm ritual mommy, but its the best she can do. The Maevster!!
Sure you're 6 months older than Ribeye, but the tabloids have been reporting about these so called "cougars" lately, so I'm gonna keep my eyes on you. I see you eyeing my beer, yeah, that's right, it has one full pound of pure imported hops while competitors only have a 1/4 of that, that's why your so attracted to it. But you have plenty of time to ponder that. Daddy owed me that because he foolishly bet against the Yankees in an early season series between the Yankees and White Sox. Let that be a lesson, convert from your foolish south side ways and you shall be saved! And, Uncle Bri will get you cool gifts.
1 comment:
Let's hope that if Ribeye is a boy he ends up smarter than his pops. There's no way a male Ribeye will have a shot with my baby girl if he's a Yankees fan.
Ahhh, who am I kidding... she's practically drunk already...
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